


Flexibility Redo

by AJ_Jesterdude_Gone_Wild



Category: Homestuck
Genre: First Time, First Time Blow Jobs, First Time Bottoming, I'm redoing this cause wow there's a lot of errors in the classic one, M/M, dildo
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-01
Updated: 2019-05-01
Packaged: 2020-02-10 20:11:49
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,286
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18667546
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AJ_Jesterdude_Gone_Wild/pseuds/AJ_Jesterdude_Gone_Wild
Summary: John finds a dildo, and shenanigans, as they always do, ensue.





	1. A Discovery

John wasn’t gay. He knew that, and he made sure everyone else had known it too. And yet he was here, looking at a dildo. John had been walking through his house when he spotted the fake penis lying under his bed. The phallic rubber toy wasn’t his, as he wasn’t gay and he had never bought one, yet here it was. He had stood it up on the bed next to him, and he began to ponder where it could’ve come from.

 

Maybe it was a friend’s? He flipped through his friend list in his head, and yet he couldn’t see anyone having it. The green sex toy was of average length, maybe 5.6 inches, John guessed. It looked similar to his own tool, although he was sure he was just a smidge wider. The more he looked over it, he began to wonder if maybe, the name of the owner was written on it. He held the dildo in his hands.

 

He turned it over, and over, and over again with no luck. Of course, it wouldn’t have a name on it. With no answer to this mystery, he noticed that it had a few veins, and it was clean, as well. Why wouldn’t it be? As if it had never been used. A thought crossed John’s mind.

 

‘It wouldn’t hurt...to maybe have a quick taste?’

 

John shook his head, dismissing the rogue thought. He wasn’t gay! But the cool, rubber toy seemed inviting...and after all, didn’t Rose say something about Breath players being about flexibility? John was sure of it. He held the green cock, as if it were a lollipop, and brought it up to his lips. He eyed it nervously. Well, here goes. He poked his tongue out and quickly ran it along the underside.

 

John sat there, just puzzled. Dumbfounded. He just did that. And, weirdly, it didn’t taste that bad. John then held it again and gave it a second slow, long taste. His tongue ran over the bumps of fake veins. He paused for a moment and looked down at his pants. He was shocked...he had an erection! He wasn’t gay! Why was this turning him on?! The questions his mind were asking had no effect on his stiff member. A tent had been pitched, and it showed no signs of going down. He set down the phallic object and unzipped his pants. There was only one way to relive this...his erection sprang out, still confined in his dark blue boxers.

 

Carefully, he slipped his member out of the underwear, so it could breathe. His 5.7” dick wasn’t anything too special, not too wide or big, not too veiny or hairy. Just right in the middle. He stroked his cock, slowly, his breath starting to hitch ever so slightly. But his mind was distracted. The green sex toy beside him continued to catch his eye...an idea then sprang to life. Removing his hand from his own member, he picked up the fake penis, and then gradually took it into his mouth, circling the head of the phallic green object with his tongue.

 

He licked each and every inch, making sure it got attention where it needed it. While his mouth focused on pleasuring the rubber dick, he let his ope n hand move back to his own dick and stroked gently. John preferred to be gentle. As he neared his finale, he stopped. Another idea popped into his head. Throwing the dildo to the sheets, he dashed into his bathroom, to get some lube.

 

He scurried back to his room, and set the dildo down onto the floor, and popped the cap off the lube bottle. He glanced from the bottle to the dildo, questioning how much should be used. John shrugged to himself and squeezed out a good sized amount, lubricating the fake penis quite well. He slid off his pants and boxers and positioned himself above the toy. He took a deep breath in, and slowly lowered down. It gently entered him, and John in response to it winced. It hurt...a burning feeling sprang out, making John yelp and stand up. John limped up onto his bed. Shaking his head, he cleaned up and threw himself back together. Maybe another time, he thought.

 


	2. Movie Night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> John invites Karkat over to watch a movie with him.

It had been about 3 days since John’s experiment with the dildo. He’d been doing just fine, although his rear end still ached. Using it while he masturbated had become a regular occurrence, and tonight his training would be put to the test. He invited Karkat over, to watch THE ROOM, one of the best worst movies of all time. But, that’s not all John wanted to do with him. At around 8 PM, Karkat arrived. John opened the door.

 

“I’M HERE,” Karkat said, in his usual aggressive tone. He had his usual sweater on, despite it being quite warm out.

 

“Hello! I have it all set up, just come on in! Have a seat on the couch, or don’t, haha.”

 

Karkat walked in and sat down on the couch. John went into the kitchen and grabbed some popcorn, and sat next to him, and they began to watch Tommy work his shitty, shitty magic. Karkat seemed to be genuinely enjoying himself. Around the halfway point the two began to riff on the movie, bursts of laughter spilling out of them whenever anyone on the screen said anything. Suddenly the TV switched off, as well with the lights.

 

“AW HELL, NOW WHAT?” Karkat groaned. He switched back to his usual pissed off self.

 

“I think the power went out...shit.”

 

“WELL, WHAT’S THE PLAN NOW, EGBERT?”

 

John shrugged. The sun had just set, casting the darkness upon the house. He went looking for a flashlight, while Karkat tapped away on his phone. John triumphantly returned with a large, black flashlight. He turned it on and sat it down on the side table next to the couch like a candle. Light spilled back into the living room.

 

The two sat in awkward silence, having trouble breaking it. Karkat finally spoke up.

 

“SO...WHAT ELSE DO YOU HAVE THAT WE COULD DO?” He asked, boredom possessing his words.

 

“Uh...hm. I don’t really have anything else...but I do have...an idea.” John answered, a sly grin passing over his face.

 

“WHAT IS IT?” Karkat said, some relief being brought into his voice.

 

“Recently I’ve been uh...experimenting, I guess that’s what you’d call it,” John explained. “and, I was...wondering if you could uh...maybe...uhm.”

 

“SPIT IT OUT, DUMBASS.” Karkat spewed.

 

“Okay! Fine! I was wondering if you’d let me blow you, jeez!” John revealed, holding his hands up in the air.

 

Karkat sat there. He was staring off into the distance, and he looked like he was thinking about it. But there was still that pissed look on his face...seconds felt like years. John realized that maybe he messed up.

 

“Shit, sorry dude. I should’ve just shut u-” He began, face red.

 

“FINE. GET OVER HERE.” Karkat grumbled, unzipping his pants.

 

John jumped. “W-What??”

 

“C’MON, EGBERT. DO YOU WANNA BLOW ME OR NOT? ‘CAUSE NOW’S YOUR CHANCE.” He said, annoyed.

 

John hurried to the floor and helped Karkat get his member free. It hung out of his boxers, flaccid. John leaned in, and took it into his mouth, as he had done with the green dildo a few days earlier. Karkat had to have been about, say, 6.4 inches? He did what he had done with the sex toy; circling his head with his tongue, and being slow and gentle, making sure his teeth came no-where near Karkat’s junk.

 

“F-FUCK.” Was all Karkat was able to get out, for he was filled with pleasure. John was shockingly good at this. He pushed into John’s mouth. He clearly was enjoying this.

 

John took the whole thing down, his nose pressed up against Karkat’s curly pubic hairs. He went back, leaving only the tip in his mouth. They fell into a pattern, back and forth, with the short break for John to give attention to other things. Soon, they quickened their pace, faster and faster. John’s own dick was strained against his shorts.

 

“J-JOHN...I THINK I’M G-GONNA-” Karkat shouted out, quickly pulling John off his dick.

 

He shot rope after rope of red sticky material all over John’s face, hair, and glasses. It dripped down, staining his white shirt.

 

“...SORRY.” He apologized, his breathing heavy.

 

“Eugh...don’t worry about it...I’m gonna take a shower. Your stuff tastes horrible, by the by.” John joked. He got up and began to move upstairs.

 

“WAIT, I THINK YOU, UH...SHOULD BE REWARDED.” Karkat hastily added, a suggestive look sprawled on his face.

 

John smiled. He was going to enjoy this.


	3. Experimentation

A little over a week had passed since John’s hangout with Karkat, and John was ready to experiment once again. None of his friends were available, so he grabbed the dildo once more, as well as his bottle of lube. He went to his room and threw off his pants, and boxers. John sat the dildo on the floor and popped open the bottle. He quizzically looked at the dildo. How would he do it this time?

 

He squeezed out more than enough and lubed the sex toy well. He also put a tad on his fingers, this time he would prepare himself. He lay on his side, and with one hand, spread his cheeks revealing his tight, pink asshole. With his other hand, he slowly, and carefully pushed a well-lubed finger in. It hurt, slightly. He pushed it all the way in, and then pulled it back out. He continued the slow pattern of in and out. The pain slowly diminished and was replaced with a bit of pleasure. John switched to two fingers.

 

After he was done prepping his behind, he positioned himself above the rubber dick. He lowered himself, and the head quickly pushed through. A moan escaped John’s mouth.

 

“A-Ahn!”

 

It hurt, like before, but not as much. The fingering before really did help. He continued to lower until it was all inside of him. He stifled more moans as he lifted himself up. He fell into a pattern, slowly down, slowly up, the pain diminishing, replaced with pleasure as he continued. After a while, the pain had subsided, letting lust have its way. John quickened his pace, going up and down faster, as his hand moved to stroke his cock.

 

Moans of lust spilled from John’s mouth, as he came. Rope after rope of hot white cum spilled out of his dick, spraying the floor. John sat, fake cock still resting inside him. He lifted himself up, slowly, and went to take a shower.

 

‘That felt pretty good,’ John thought. ‘I’ll have to do it again sometime.’


	4. Finally, They Fuck

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The title explains it all, Bucko.

John smiled as he held the phone in his hands. He had yet another idea, and he knew exactly who’d help him execute it. John punched in the number and waited for him to pick up.

 

“HELLO?” The familiar, loud voice asked.

 

“Hey, Kar! It’s John. You left something here when we watched The Room.”   


 

“I DID? WHAT DID I LOSE? I DON’T REMEMBER LOSING ANYTHING, JOHN.” Karkat insisted.

 

“You did! You left this bracelet here. It’s got the sign on your sweater on it.”

 

“OH, THAT. YEAH, SURE, I’LL COME OVER TO GET IT.”

 

“Sweet. See you in a bit.”

 

He hung up, and eagerly awaited the troll’s arrival. Around noon he showed up and knocked heavily on Egbert’s front door. John eagerly opened it.

 

“HEY. WHERE IS IT?”

 

“Come on in, it’s in the kitchen.”

 

Karkat stepped inside, hurrying to the kitchen. When John entered he saw Karkat pocketing the bracelet.

 

“THANKS,” Karkat said, making his way to the front door. John had to act fast.

 

“Hey, wait!”

“WHAT?”

 

“You think you could help me out with something again?”

 

“UGH, JOHN, DO YOU WANT TO BLOW ME AGAIN?” Karkat said, annoyed.

 

“No, not exactly...I want you to uh, eheh, fuck me.” John explained.

 

Karkat was stunned quiet. He shook his head.

 

“FINE. GET READY, AND TELL ME WHEN YOU’RE GOOD. BUT I’M NOT GOING EASY ON YOU, EGBERT.” He said, pointing an accusatory finger.

 

“That’s okay! I’ll be right back.”

 

John scurried upstairs and returned with the bottle of lube. He pulled his pants and underwear down and lubed up his back entrance. Karkat snatched the bottle and applied some to his member.

 

“BEND OVER, JOHN,” Karkat commanded, stroking his dick.

 

John obliged, and laid his upper half over the kitchen table. Karkat moved behind him and bent over to whisper into his ear.

 

“ARE YOU READY?”

 

“Yeah, I think so.”

  
  
“GOOD.”

 

Then, Karkat thrust in quickly, causing John to cry out in pain. It seemed that Karkat wasn’t joking. He pistoned in and out, he was experienced in topping. John wondered how he could’ve gotten so good. Soon, the pain turned to wonderous pleasure, and John found himself pushing up against Karkat. He moved one of his hands down to his dick and began to rub it, pre already leaking from it.

 

The two continued like this for a while, and soon Karkat began to thrust harder and faster. He pushed into John and quickly came inside him. John was surprised at the feeling and then shot into his own hand. The two stayed there momentarily, resting in the aftermath bliss. Karkat pulled out and then left the kitchen. John followed, finding him on the couch, out cold. John laughed to himself as he went up to shower. They were absolutely doing this one more time today, at least. 


End file.
